LesleyBrogan
LesleyBrogan
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  • 2022 Journeying Together through Advent
  • Home
  • Advent 2020
  • Lent 2020
  • Lent 2019
  • Lent 2018
  • Advent 2017
  • Lesley's Blog: Holding On and Letting Go
  • Relying on the Moon: Companioning Grief for 29 Days
    • Relying on the Moon (book excerpt)
    • 2014 Advent Daily Readings
  • Advent 2018
  • Traveling This Tender Advent

2022 Journeying Together through Advent

Leave it to Sam to add `hope’

12/16/2022

3 Comments

 
Picture
Saturday, December 17, 2022
 
Most every night when the boys were growing up, we would say prayers together. They would do whatever cleaning up and brushing teeth and eventually each one would crawl under his sheets. Saying prayers and singing songs at the end of their days was my favorite mothering of Brogan and Sam – well that and coaching baseball, but that’s another story.
 
Of course, some nights went smoother than others. Truth be told, some nights prayers probably didn’t happen. But most every night, the boys and I would say prayers together. They shared the same room until Brogan was 10 or so. The practice grew-up with them, shifting and adapting to fit the three of us, individually and together.
 
When they were little-little we would talk about their days and then say the Lord’s Prayer and sing a couple songs with the guitar (Christopher Robin, Jenny the Flying Girl). When Brogan started going to kindergarten, I was really nosey about how his day went and his answer was “fine” or “ok,” so we added another piece to our ritual: `best thing and hardest thing.’ Each of us would take turns saying what the best thing was of their days and also what their hardest things were.
 
This was such a good practice for me. Often, when it was my turn, I would say that that time with them was the best part of my day – and it was. `Best and hardest’ was a way to bless each day. It grew into being a chance to pay attention. A way to mark each of our moments and then to share them with each other. In the midst and mess of whatever was going on in the world outside of our house, this nightly practice became a way to breathe-in just how precious this time was with my sons. We sang spirituals and goofy songs and songs I’d learned at camp. Through those years, we often ebbed and flowed together.
 
Best things and hardest things of the day grew up with the three of us. Sometimes our conversations were funny, sometimes they were tender. Sometimes they shared something really sad that a friend had said or done that day that had hurt their feelings. And that was so hard for me. I reassured myself that I was helping them say good and hard things out loud, but sometimes the tenderness of those sharing’s broke my heart. 
 
One night somewhere along the way after we’d checked in with prayers and were gonna start singing, Sam said something like, “Lelley, why don’t we say what we are hoping for, too?” And in that moment, time stopped. Why hadn’t I thought of that? Of course! What a great idea! Broadening our stories with each other, opening our stories to what could yet be was truly a life-gift. Thanks to Sam, our practice opened just a bit wider. By adding that practice of saying our hopeful thing, right away I didn’t worry so much about them being in the midst and the mess of the world.  Here at the end of the day they were able to talk about the good and hard things. We were leaning in and listening. And each night, thanks to a little child leading us, we were welcomed into hope, into seeing something better.

Thanks to Ed and Deb (aka Amy) for today's picture. 

3 Comments
claudia brogan
12/17/2022 09:01:02 am

what a wonderful post: thank you so much. i think it has been a LIFE-GIFT to help those boys learn how to say both the good news AND the harder news of the day. and i had totally forgotten (but totally love!) that Sam was in the inserter of the hopeful part. because that's really kind of perfect. This is a marvelous, cozy and wise reminder on this fine day. thank you so much

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Bridget
12/17/2022 03:52:59 pm

I so love this. The end of a busy day with young children, to snuggle and chat and sing snd say prayers are memories to treasure.

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Deb aka amy
12/17/2022 04:37:06 pm

Love this story and the origin of best thing hardest thing and hopeful thing that I’ve heard you talk about forever….and hey that giant candle in the photo is something else! Thinking of you all with a smile on my face
Amy 4th bell

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    Lesley Brogan

    May this Advent be a time of welcoming wonder and joy. This season may you be reminded in great and small ways of God's loving and enduring promise of YES.

    Lesley is a grateful mom to two kind and generous sons, John Brogan and Sam.

    Recently retired, Les and her partner, Lori live with their two pooches, Sammy and Abby in Pacific Beach, California. 

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